# Honerable Kent Conrad



## zogman (Mar 20, 2002)

I had this great email letter and thought I would share it. Brings up lots of great thoughts. I should be able to save at least 70K by becoming an illegal.

The Honorable Kent Conrad
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senator Conrad,
As a native Nodakian excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005. 
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year. 
Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.

Thank you for your assistance

Your Loyal Constituent

PS Why did Seanator Dorgan not vote with you?????


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## hunter9494 (Jan 21, 2007)

i like it.


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## jdpete75 (Dec 16, 2003)

ooooooh how clever you can cut and paste :roll:


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## Plainsman (Jul 30, 2003)

jdpete75 said:


> ooooooh how clever you can cut and paste :roll:


and your post is brilliance? :eyeroll:

There is nothing wrong with cut and past if it expresses your opinion eloquently. You may see it otherwise, but your post falls short of less than nothing. Maybe your could try critiquing the content rather than sinking to demeaning the poster.

Whoever wrote this little gem had a good point. I for one think it is ludicrous for an illegal alien to enjoy benefit's beyond those available to a tax paying legal citizen. Far to often our nation forgets who runs the ship. Even our towns in North Dakota offer tax incentives to attract new business, but have you ever heard of tax incentives to retain any already there. I have not.


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## woodpecker (Mar 2, 2005)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## always_outdoors (Dec 17, 2002)

Cut and paste is fine as long as there isn't Copywright issues involved.

Back to the topic. This email came across my desk about a week ago and I first got a chuckle out of it, but then I was wondering.....

Wouldn't you have to denounce your citizenship first? I guess I am not sure. I would think you would have to denounce your citizenship and become a citizen of another country right?

If someone sends this off, can they tell us what the reply is?


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## zogman (Mar 20, 2002)

I posted it on here as sort of a joke. However it is way to serious of an issue to take lightly. When I send Conrad mail I always compose my own. I make it short, sweet with very pointed questions. All I get back is political spin in a form letter. You figure?????


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## People (Jan 17, 2005)

I do not want to give up my US citizenship. I wonder if I can be considered three people(Me, Myself, and I) I will keep US citizenship of Myself and let me and I be illegal. Now that I am three people my work would have to pay me for three people. Even though I do the work of 4. lol Two of me would keep the full paycheck and Myself would pay my share. That sounds like a good deal. Also for Myself I want Canadian citizenship. Since I already know how to say "please do not shoot me I am Canadian!" in every language I know. I would be set.


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## Plainsman (Jul 30, 2003)

My take is that it is tongue in cheek about a very serious issue. Like much humor there is some and in many cases much truth involved. The whole point is these illegal (law breakers) are getting a sweetheart deal. In some aspects better than those of us born here and paying taxes all our lives. If the shoe was on the other foot and Mexico had twice, perhaps three or four times the living standards do you think they would let me come there illegally, give me free health care, and exempt me from taxes for a couple years? I'll pay that $2000 fine in a heartbeat.

Mui bueno reparto mi amigo. Kae pasa para mi sur de el borde .


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## Plainsman (Jul 30, 2003)

How is this for a cut and paste? Funny, not funny ??????? OOooooh no, was that profiling?

[siteimg]7088[/siteimg]


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## People (Jan 17, 2005)

Good pic. I always wondered about that. Now if the camels at the Bismarck airport go missing we now know where the police should start looking. Who am I kidding like they would ever get threw our security.


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