# Who would win...



## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

in a air hockey match between










and


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

...in a grimacing contest










or


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## buckseye (Dec 8, 2003)

:rollin: :toofunny:


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

a thumb war










or


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

in a cooking contest










vs.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

in a goose calling contest










or


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## mallardhunter (May 15, 2004)

:rollin:


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## Remmi_&amp;_I (Dec 2, 2003)




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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

in a battle of wits










vs.


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## djleye (Nov 14, 2002)

Little bored are we Kieth????

:lol:


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

a game of Halo 2










versus challenger


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

I'm going to have to go with the Images Hosted by Angelfire logo for the matchup in halo 2.








has been disqualified as he is entered in more than one contest.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

No one was entered twice, check your faces again.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

You're not getting Jack Palance (of City Slickers fame) and Bob Barker mixed up are you 870...by the way, how did the papa johns treat you yesterday? Make everything feel all better?


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

the papa johns was aged to perfection, creating a wonderful balance with the 37 chews i had yesterday while counterbalancing the lack of sleep. I'm getting a







on the battle of whits, the cooking contest, and the thumb war. Thus resulting in disqualification, unless of course my home computer and work computer decided that it was in my best interests to not view these pictures.


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## mr.trooper (Aug 3, 2004)

LOL! YOUR KILLI'N ME SMALLS!


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

Right click on that icon and select "View Image".

Then press your back button on your browser, you will then find out that Lil John is challenging Flava Flav at a cooking contest (I am thinking "Best of Dutch Oven) and Alan Thicke is challenging Valeries bf from "Family Ties".


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

Yeah, no dice that's all been tried.

However this dutch oven contest. I would think that this could go more to a tournament style. Definately room for more players at this event. Also a team event could take place. My sponsorships go to:

In the tounament -










and in team competition-with gary coleman being older but not larger of course.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

Bill is well known for his Dutch Oven sweets, including sweet cinamon rolls.


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

My darkhorse entry into thumb wrestling........


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

I'll see your Steve Buscemi and raise your Frank Stallone.

Frank Stallone is to thumb wrestling as brother Sly was to arm wrestling in movie "Over the Top".


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

I'm going to have to call another disqualification. Frank Stallone is not allowed into any of the aforementioned contests as we both know he would win each and every one of them hands down.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

Okay okay okay...

How about Chris Penn?










As long as no contest requires looking somewhat like a walrus, I see no reason for his disqualification.


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

I'll actually accept penn and the walrus contest both......however










I don't believe that you want that contest.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

C'mon! Even among golfers your entrant wouldn't win!


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

whoops...my bad parnevik looks nothing like a walrus


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

alright i better get something accomplished today at work, this is getting close to the point that would be deemed ridiculous.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

All I am saying is that John Daly had better never go hiking alone through a coastal Inuit village.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

ridiculous?


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

By ridiculous I obviously meant a very eductational, informational, articulated thread in which a distraction started to become apparent.


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## djleye (Nov 14, 2002)

This looks much more like the Walrus!!!!


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

Wow, optometrist....and photoshop magician!


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## djleye (Nov 14, 2002)

Jack of all trades, master of none except Eyecare!!!! :wink:


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

Who would win....a game of twister....










vs.










vs.










vs.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

Well let's see.

Alec is the oldest of the Baldwin brothers, but his age is well maintained. Alec is in the running for the "fittest" baldwin brother. Detracting from his seeming advantage is his divorce from supermodel Kim Basinger. His current commitment to celebacy has severely hindered from his flexibility.

Billy Baldwin, the angry Baldwin, has also maintained a decent physique, although the reasons for this have to do less with exercise than it does with rampant cocaine use, which is not known for it's limb limbering qualites.

Stephen Baldwin, the crazy Baldwin, is known for great movies such as "Biodome". Also known as a drug user, Stephen has recently given his life to the Lord, and can be seen crying with his Venezualean wife on the Trinity Bible Network. Through sobriety he has a new lease on life that may give him the advantage he needs to win such a coveted game.

Not much is known about Daniel Baldwin, aka the fat Baldwin. What we do know is he is quite the darkhorse. His roll in "Attack of the 50 Foot Woman" did nothing but prepare him for a spirited game of Twister.

After weighing the pros and cons of every brother (I even considered cousin Joseph), I predict Billy the winner after beating the rest of his brothers into a bloody coma after taking a bad trip (assuming Stephen doesnt' wear the tortoise shell helmet, in which case he is obviously the most talented and favored in a clean game).


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

Not much can be said to combat your theory. Wow is one thing that comes to mind, solid logic all the way around. It has yet to be determined if the tortoise helmet will be allowed into competition.


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## craigers (Dec 16, 2004)

Just joined the site today, looks like a great place. Lots of great info, and this is the funniest thing I have witnessed in years. The baldwins, you gotta be kiddin me smalls. :lol:


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

in a scrabble match (open tournament)










vs.










vs.










vs.










vs.


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## jamartinmg2 (Oct 7, 2004)

I move we substitute this version of Mel for the one that is pictured above.


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## smalls (Sep 9, 2003)

I'm an idiot...sorry.

It is obviously Ryggs v. McLean moreso than Gibson v. Willis.


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

I was recently contacted about this proposed open tournament, involving the battle of titans in a little thing called scrabble. The individual was very threatening in telling me not to use his name before tournament time, but he did however agree to a picture. Which is obviously the only way to enter such a tournament.


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## 870 XPRS (Mar 12, 2003)

I forgot to mention though, that he requested that bo jackson be present for moral support. He feels that this would discourage the would be winner from actually winning.


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