# Confessions of a Travel Agent



## Springer (Dec 21, 2004)

I have been a Travel Agent in Washington for thirty years, and I believe
> I have an answer as to why this country is in trouble!
>
> Consider these examples:
>
> I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her
> hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
>
> I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I
> started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information,
> then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but
> Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like
> the stupid one, I calmly explained,"Cape Cod is in Massachusetts,
> Capetown is in Africa." Her response, (click).
>
> A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we
> did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was
> expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that in Orlando it is not
> possible, since Orlando is in the middle
> of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map, and
> Florida is a very thin state!"
>
> I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see
> England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close
> on the map."
>
> An aide for a Bush (41) cabinet member once called and asked if he could
> rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had
> only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a
> car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to
> drive between the gates to save time."
>
>
> An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was
> possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20 a.m. and got into
> Chicago at 8:33 a.m.. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead
> of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones.
> Finally, I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!
>
> A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical
> description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I
> | said, "No, why do you ask?"
> She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on
> my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that is very
> rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I 'looked into it' (I
> was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno,
> CA is (FAT), and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on
her
> luggage.
>
> A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After
> going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
> California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
>
> I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I
> know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which
he
> replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn
planes
> have numbers on them."
>
> A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida.
> Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if
> she meant fly to Pensacola, FL, on a commuter plane.
> She said, "Yeah, whatever!"
>
> A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed
in
> order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports,
> reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China
> many times and never had to have one of those." I double-checked and sure
> enough, his stay required a visa.
> When told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every
> time they have accepted my American Express!"
>
> A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations. "I wanted to go
> |from Chicago to Rhino, New York." The agent was at a loss for words.
> Finally, the agent said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"
> "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady.
> | After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've
> looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino
> anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where
> it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New
> York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
> "That's it! I knew it was one of those big animals!" she said.
>
> Now you know why Government is in the shape that it is in..
> A. J. (Jerry) Dyck, CIA, CFE
> Management & Audit Services


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## racer66 (Oct 6, 2003)

:lol: TOO MUCH


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## Gohon (Feb 14, 2005)

Remember Pat Schroeder, the Democrat congresswoman from Colorado?
This I kid you not was in the papers years ago when she was in congress. Seems she heard there was ump-teen thousand cattle guards in the state of Colorado. She called a meeting of her staff and wanted to know who had jurisdiction over them and who was paying them and how much.


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## Draker16 (Nov 23, 2004)

:rollin: :rollin: :rollin:


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